Is “Dirty” Sex Better?
Dirty Sex is Better Sex.
A friend of a friend (otherwise known as a F.O.A.F.) read something about Johnny Depp online and then read between the lines.
“He’s really dirty, you know,” she said dreamily. “Dirty and dark, with the face of angel.” She sighed.
Then a few days later, in a bored moment, I asked a guy friend to choose whom he’d have sex with, Angelina Jolie or Jennifer Anniston.
“Sex with Angie,” he said instantly, like he’d thought about it for three decades. “You marry a Jenn.”
At the peril of logic, I asked him to elaborate.
“Angie’s dark and dirty. That’s sexy,” he said. “Jenn’s nice, the girl-next-door. Mom would like her. That’s not sexy.”
Just to break the tie, I asked a third friend, another guy. “Do you think sex is better when it’s dirty?” I said.
He paused for a nanofraction of a nanosecond and said, “That’s is the stupidest question anyone has ever asked me.” He went on. “If it’s not dirty, you’re not doing it right.”
Notice a trend here. Three people had connected the same dots in the same way: dirty, dark, and hot. Are my friends just a bunch of sex-crazed sickos? Or are they expressing a more universal, secret desire?
Who knows? One thing’s for sure though, if you’ve ever found yourself thinking something that you’re too embarrassed to say during sex (as in, ‘I’d wish he’d shove the butt plug in’…or some such thing), you may be repressing a key to better sex: keeping it edgey.
I once read this book about creativity. The author said you should do something new every day to open your mind. Well, I say, why not try something new every time you have sex? You never know what will happen, especially after you’ve exercised the obvious possibilities and you find yourself in a whole new realm of wild and weird.
If you do try this exercise, be sure to report back to me on what you discover. (I don’t actually have seasoned sex, I just write about.)
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Comments
Every kitten next door is the potential tiger..
Three cheers to the girls next door 
Yours Jommi Lifelover
I guess it depends. I’m not always in the mood for dirty sex. Yes, it can be hot and exciting, but sometimes I’d rather have some slow, lazy sex.
I’m with Tessa on this one – it just depends on your mood.
Friday evening: I want crazy, mad, dirty sex.
Sunday Morning: I want homely, hugging, sex.
The common theme is: wanting sex, regardless of the variety !
I’m sure that Angelina wants it homely sometimes, and likewise, Jen wants to get the butt plugs out sometimes..,
Ultimately, intimacy grows from deep knowledge – that takes time.
I know a ‘Tessa’ who has lived this philosophy with me. I can’t tell from the blog posted here whether it’s the same Tessa. Does the Tessa who posted above have an interest in Lacan ?
The dirtier the better. “Making love” is great, but hardcore, perverted sex is more satisfying. Btw- Pam, you are so lovely (vanilla). Pam, you make my mouth water (dirty).