Oh My God, That Feels Good.

Just when I thought marriage was dead, now there’s reason to rethink it — if only to solve the kinds of problems that come with marriage.

As reported in the New York Times, the best solution for marital unhappiness is sex. And lots of it. Like, we’re talking daily.

Talking in Tongues Takes on a Whole New Meaning.

That’s the take of Rev. Ed Young of the evangelical Fellowship Church in Grapevine, Texas. He recently challenged the “marrieds” among his flock of 20,000 to do more flocking. Or what he referred to as “congregational copulation.”

This cry for “sexperimentation” was delivered while pacing in front of a large bed on a candlelit stage, guitars strumming in the background. “Sometimes,” reports the author of the article, “he reclined on the paisley coverlet while flipping through a Bible, emphasizing his point that it is time for the church to put God back in the bed.”

God Bliss Me, I love this guy. He must be reading some kind of modern version of the Bible — one with lots of centerfolds.

Now, I’m no Pastor and I may even have a little devil in me but how can you argue with the Sex Solution? Let the Rev answer that for you. You can’t. Sex, he says, adds intimacy to a relationship, brings you closer to God, improves productivity, leaves a loving legacy for your children to follow, and may even prevent an extramarital affair. If that weren’t enough, it’s even good for the economy, helping you go from “whining to whoopee.”

Bail me out, baby. And it’s about time. Americans are sex starved. That’s why we talk so much about it. That’s why an intimate gesture has been reduced to handing your partner the remote. Enough! Rise up people and take the Rev’s Sex Challenge. Do it everyday for the next seven days, and then tell me just how great God can be.

May ‘Oh My God’ go with you.

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